Sunday, October 16, 2011

Telling the family

Oct 16, 2011

Since I am visiting my parents at their house when we learn our exciting news, I don't wait long to tell them.  I'm not going to walk around a house, visit with family, avoid wine, and keep this a secret.  The first pregnancy, there was no way to tell them in person, but this second time, I'm here, and I'm not going to wait.  Mike completely agrees and encourages me to tell them as soon as I can.

Of course, this second time around telling family seems to take a bit more time...My mom and brother are at the house after church, and I get Mike on skype so that we can tell them together.  He is leaving for a conference in Boston in an hour and won't be very available for the next several days, so this is our chance.  But my dad is still at church.  We stall, Mike talks to D on skype, we lose the connection a few times, we wait.  Finally, my dad returns home and we get to share our exciting news. They are very happy for us, of course, and it is great to see my mom's excited reaction in person this time!  It feels good!

At dinner out that night, I tell my brother's wife and my niece and nephew (then a few days later do a scavenger hunt for them leading to a baby surprise treat), and now there is only one brother and sister-in-law left to tell.  We call and skype several times, but are never able to reach them at the same time.  Finally, weeks later, he is available on the phone, but my SIL is painting and he says she can't talk.  Mike and I are together and we decide we will tell them anyway, and my brother can pass on the news to my painting sister-in-law!  And so we do!  And this time, unlike the first time, my brother hasn't guessed in advance what we are about to tell him.

We decide to wait until we are together to tell Mike's parents in person.  I wanted to tell my family so quickly, we didn't plan an elaborate way of telling them (although D helped us by announcing, "Mommy is pregnant!" And no, he doesn't know what that means yet).  So I looking forward to finding a creative way to tell them.  However, adjacent to the news of our baby, Mike receives a job offer that while exciting, also requires a good deal of global travel.  He is talking to his mother one evening when Mike and I are still hundreds of miles apart, and mentions our concern of his travel in light of our...he hesitates. He realizes he is saying too much...his mom fills in the blank, "Tara is pregnant?"  Mike stutters, then conference calls me in quickly, and tells his mom the news.  She congratulates us and gets Mike's dad on the phone.  Mike gives him the news (he is excited, as well of course).  Not exactly as we had planned to tell them, but as in life, we roll with all of it!  And now we have many months ahead of us to simply enjoy the news with all of our family.


grandma berta said...

I remember not being suspicious of "Mike wanting some help from Dad" about something around the house. I also remember Dylan's "Mommy's present" and knowing immediately what that PRESENT meant! The guys took a bit longer I think! The same thing at the dinner, Marnie caught on before the kids realized what he said.

Mike said...

Heh. Yup, I goofed. I'd just gone through the story/explanation with someone else, and was simply walking through it, and forgot to censor the part of the story about the baby. Oops! Itchy trigger finger..!