Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Our 20 week anatomy screening: We find out the sex of our baby

Tuesday, December 2, is the day we have been waiting for. 2pm: Our anatomy screening. We will make sure all is going well with the baby's development, and we will also find out the sex of our baby.

Mike takes the day off of work and I leave my job early to race home and meet him, so we can drive up together. I am a bit stressed at first, as we get a later start than I had hoped. We misunderstand each other about what directions to take, and I have not eaten lunch (thank goodness for that smoothie from work). But we get out the door, into the car, and try to relax. Mike is very excited. I am excited, but I am anxious. We arrive at the facility on time, and Mike videotapes our waiting at the office. I am too anxious to talk, I tell him, so he narrates the beginning of our adventure.

After we check in, we wait in a lobby until a woman with a thick accent comes out to explain she is finishing her internship and will do the "first photographs" then "Kararah" (or Kara, or a name like that--I never did understand what she said) will finish. "Okay," I say a bit hesitantly.

We walk into the ultrasound room, and the lights are dim. It's cozy in here. They are smart to keep the lights low, not only so that we can watch the screens better, but to give a calming yet exciting energy to the room. I think I want my delivery to be in a dimly lit room too.

I lay back, am slathered with goo, and we start seeing our baby. We can see so much more than the last time, 8 weeks ago. The ribs stand out to me, the black "hole" that is the stomach, the bladder. We see the umbilical cord, the head, 5 fingers on a hand, a clear foot.

I ask the intern if she can tell what sex the baby is, and she says, "Oh yes, but I cannot tell you. That is for Kararah/Kara to say."

I think I see a little something between the baby's legs, but I am too untrained to know what is what.

The intern takes dozens of pictures and explains the various parts (although "Kara" later corrects her on one of the names she has typed onto the screen). We watch on a tv screen in front of us, while she points out body parts on her own screen, which does not face us. But I appreciate her effort.

After about 20 minutes (Mike filming the whole time), the mysterious "Kara" person comes in. She seems young and relaxed, like a friend, and we find the whole process with her resembling something familiar. We tell her we want to know the sex, we joke about the care bear poll on our blog, we talk about old wives' tales to tell the sex of the baby (she has an interesting eye-lid one), and I find the experience quite pleasant.

Five minutes into her time doing the ultrasound on me, she focuses her image on the baby's butt. I'll let the video take over as to what happens in the next 60 seconds...

So it is official! We are having a baby boy! Lying on the patient's bed, I tear up thinking about this; we are one step closer to knowing our baby. I feel a gush of momentous reality wash over me...we are having a son. I grab Mike's hand (the one he's not using to videotape) and hold it for a few minutes. He kisses me and we laugh and smile.

I must admit, that while the poll closed with "girl" beating "boy" by 2 votes, most people whom I see on a regular basis have been saying boy lately. The wives' tales pointed to boy, there are a lot of first born boys on Mike's and my side of the family. I am not surprised that we are having a son.

However...there was some part of me that still thought we might be having a girl. Perhaps I would have felt the same if we found out we were having a daughter. I really did not know, so no matter which way it went, I would not be surprised...yet also be a little surprised. That's the nature of 50/50, I guess!

Just knowing what we are having though has made it a bit more real. It's still surreal, and, as I said before, I don't think that is going to change any time soon, but I do feel somehow different. I know I have a little boy inside of me, and that just feels... different...As they said in Sex and the City, when Miranda found out she was having a boy, "You have a little penis inside of you!" Yes, I do!

So take a look at our handsome little boy in his 5th month of life! He was a bit camera-shy, putting his arms, then his legs, over his face. But "Kararhahahrah" managed to get one nice profile shot with his fist to his face with the 4D (real time) imaging. I think he looks like Mike already! We love our little boy!


Unknown said...

:) he is so handsome, and what a great dancer!

Unknown said...

:) he is so handsome, and what a great dancer!

Monsoon Mama said...

this is so amazing. it's such a wonderful process to get closer and closer to really knowing and meeting your baby! and now you can say "he" when you refer to the baby instead of "the baby"... fantastic! and FWIW, when i found out that i was having a boy, i thought it was hilarious and totally wacky that there was a little penis inside of me (i totally had the sex & the city reaction!) i think because we're female, it's particularly odd to think about boys and boy parts being inside of us and part of our own bodies, you know? pregnancy and birth are can be pretty damn miraculous, i think. i'm so happy for you guys!

Unknown said...

Congrats Mike and Tara! I totally thought it was going to be a girl, though.

He's totally gonna be a cookie baking, party-planning, play-writing rock star with bizness skilzz!

Boston Pam said...

Hi Tara & Mike

Just wanted to extend our congrats to you on your baby boy! Seems to be the trend around here! Take care and good luck on the rest of your journey!

Pam (Ben & Robyn's friend from Dartmouth)

grandma berta said...

Again, I'm writing this with tears running down my face. What a thrill! (boy or girl, it'd be a thrill) Knowing now it's baby boy Bouteneff!

Tara M said...

Thanks, Susan--we think he's cute for a womb-baby. :) And he is a constant mover now!

Div--totally--I feel the same way! Since I'm a girl myself, it is just a bit weirder knowing I have a baby boy inside of me! It does make me smile.

Jon--yeah, boy won out! But we are excited for the little rock star.

Pam--thanks for checking out our blog! You have 2 boys yourself, right? I just read on your blog one is 6 months now! Has it flown by?

Mom--thanks as always! Looking forward to seeing you only in a few weeks for Christmas!

Mike said...

We're still working on that whole 'name' thing now... Why does it seem harder to name a boy than a girl? :)

By the way, you may have noticed that I said, "Is that _the_ penis?" rather than "Is that _a_ penis?" Why? 'Cause I already knew the moment I asked. I'm like, a sonogram MASTER.

Boston Pam said...


Yes, two boys, and Shaun is now 6 months old. It DOES fly by so make sure you enjoy every moment. I wrote about my experience with both boys on the blog and it's fun to go back and see what David was doing at this point in Shaun's life!

You look fabulous by the way!!