Sunday, August 31, 2008

6 Weeks--not sleeping

Six and a half weeks along...we have told a few other people now. My close friend from High School knows (she has 3 daughters herself), a few of my college friends know, and a few coworkers know. It feels good that I can confide in others now. It helps my anxiety somewhat, but I still feel like I am constantly wired on coffee!

I am not sleeping well at all. I have never been a good sleeper, and it's only worsened now. I sleep with earplugs in, an eye pillow covering the ole peepers, and a loud fan to drown out excess noise the earplugs can't handle. I seem to be able to fall asleep, but I cannot stay asleep. I wake up frequently, and then permanently around 4 or 5am. My body stays alert, as though adrenaline is pumping through it and no amount of relaxation techniques can quiet me.

Despite the little amount of sleep I am getting, I do not feel drowsy. At work, I am on my feet a lot, interacting with others and don't have a chance to feel sleepy. At home, I engage myself in activities, and I don't want to sleep. At night, I want to sleep, but my body is too energized from nerves to settle down.

The people who know I'm pregnant tell me this will soon change. One of my coworkers who is pregnant (her due date is only 5 days before mine, so we are neck and neck) says she is sleeping all the time--long hours at night, and taking naps during the day, and still tired. She says it'll catch up to me soon. Another friend who had a baby a few years ago also struggled with sleeping at first. She tells me that once the initial phase ends, I will get the best sleep of my life being pregnant. The amount of energy used being pregnant is like climbing a mountain, someone tells me. The exhaustion should allow me to sleep...

I have been waiting for this day to come...

Still waiting...

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